Gents

You cannot expect your wife to
enjoy sex if you only like doing it
in two positions (you on top and
then her on top). If you think your woman is happy with just those two positions, then YOU ARE LYING TO YOURSELF!!! You need to change NOW!!

When our African women meet at baby showers/ parties), the conversations quickly turn to sex positions. They talk about all sorts of positions, what they like and dislike about them etc. In Zimbabwe they talk endlessly about The Helicopter position…**which is a dangerous position (I wrote about this somewhere)** and The Frozen Chicken position **which really is just missionary position with her knees on her shoulders**.

Now, imagine your poor wife, sitting there quietly, listening to all the juicy stories with completely nothing to say. All she can do is smile but inside she will be boiling with frustration. The more she hears them talk, the more frustrated she gets. She’ll end up concluding that her sex life is rubbish which will result in her NOT enjoying sex with you.

She knows she can’t even suggest one new position to you because you are so set in your stupid backward ways. You think Doggy Style is “disrespectful” and all the other styles are for “westerners”. My friend, stop being stupid. If you do this, you are just being very, very stupid. There’s no better way to explain it.

The truth is: YOUR WIFE THINKS YOU ARE BORING IN BED! Actually, lets face it, you ARE boring!

Your wife should enjoy doing EVERY position with you, and even invent new ones. She wants to try out new things with you. She wants to know how your dick feels when you slide it in her from the side whilst she’s blindfolded… with her legs tied together…

You need to change my friend, otherwise your wife might start to look elsewhere…and that’s the last thing you want.

I’ve run out of things to say on this subject. So…

Icho!

Svirorist!

Sugar Dick Dupree

Ye Of Two Positions

One thought on “Ye Of Two Positions

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s