Interview with Sugar Dick Dupree by Adina Shebeen for Chinamwari Magazine..
ADINA: Hie Sugar, can you please tell us ladies here more about this thing called The New Side Chick. I heard that there is a new type of side chick out there. Can you help us understand here.
SDD: Thanks Adina, let me try to explain.. Have you heard of the new sidechick??
ADINA: No, this is why Im asking you..
SDD: Well, it could be YOU!
ADINA: Hai, Sugar. Im the only woman in my man’s life. Asi you are trying to tell me something?? Asi you know something that I dont know???
SDD: Ha ha da! Just because you are the only woman in your man’s life, it doesnt mean kuti you are his number one woman. Most women are side chicks and they dont even know it.
ADINA: Okay, explain please.. I need to know how I am a side chick..even though I am his only one.
SDD: Right.. Has he ever told you kuti he’s not looking for anything serious??
ADINA: Hmmm, I dont want to answer that question please..but for arguement’s sake, lets say yes… But Im his main woman..
SDD: Yaah..You might be his “main” chick but when he tells you kuti “I’m not looking for anything serious”,its a clear sign kuti you DON’T come first. If you stick around after that, you could be setting yourself up to be the new side chick.
ADINA: Carry on..
SDD: Does he give you prime time
If you only hear from him on Tuesday afternoons or after the bar closes, it means that you’re a backup plan or an after thought. He may not be with another woman, but he could be out looking for her.
ADINA: But he is a serious man who is into serious relationships, unlike you Sugar.
SDD: Hey, Im a serious man. Anyway, yeah he’s been in serious relationships before, but he’s not into one “right now.” You know he wants kids one day but doesn’t talk about them with you. That right there, Adina, is what is known as Side Chick Treatment and a clear sign kuti he still wants those things… just not with you.
ADINA: Interesting..carry on.
SDD: He hasn’t earned anything. You met him, fell hard, fell in bed and fell in love. But would he have worked for it if you hadn’t complained? If he’s not doing anything to earn your love, you could be the side chick to the future woman he’s willing to work hard for.
ADINA: Oh..what else?
SDD: If he only talks about the future with himself in it, it’s because he doesn’t see you there.
SDD: A man who’s passionate about a woman will move mountains to be by her side. “Wait,” “maybe” and “some day” are words you tell “the new side chick” not the love of your life (which we all deserve to be). When he says all these words, it shows kuti he’s not doing everything to be with you.. I remember very well one time when you, Adina, told me kuti you were waiting for your man to “grow up and get the games out of his system”.. what happened??? Are you still waiting??
ADINA: Ah hey, Leave me alone.. I do the questioning here..
SDD: Yaah. Well, I know he said that to you and let me tell you why. While you’re waiting for him to just grow out of it, he’s waiting for the main chick that will snap him out of his adolescence…and in the mean time you’re getting more attached.
ADINA: Hey, my man will change..okay?
SDD: Ha ha da! Really?! Do you actually think he will change?? You can’t make a blind man see. And a man that doesn’t see you as the new side chick won’t need time to open his eyes.
SDD: Ever had that feeling kuti there are better men out there??? Do you know why you felt that way? It’s the question that pops into your mind when you are not really happy because you are not being treated right. If you have a sneaking suspicion that there’s someone out there that can love you harder and treat you better, you’re probably right, Adina. Its time to leave.
SDD: Ask him kuti, “what have you done for me lately?” If the answer from you is “everything” and the answer from him is “not much,” it could be time to move on. He’s not putting in any effort because he’s not afraid of losing you..
ADINA: Arg, enough. I have no more questions. Men are dogs!
SDD: Really?? Which breed is your dad?